THE PAST AND PENDING

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Well, I think I’m going to stop using Tumblr now. I’ve been using it really sporadically, so this isn’t a drastic change, but I feel like I’m at a point in my life where I don’t really want to have any unnecessary connections with technology at all anymore. I’m not going to delete it, because who knows, maybe I will come back to it at some point. But for now, I want my life to be something different. I’ve grown to like who I am as a person. I’m proud of my beliefs, and what I stand for, which is something I haven’t been able to say in nearly a decade. I’ve changed as a person more than I can even put into words in the past few months, and my life philosophy has grown to be one of self-confidence and making my life my own rather than living an existence of stagnation and paralysis. I’ve come to realize that people are simply who they choose to be, what they choose and how they live. A human being is only the sum of their choices. As a result, I’ve come to desire living life by my own terms and choosing how I exist. And part of that is the desire to escape a lot of things that have held me down, and one such factor has been the Internet in general. I don’t regret my time on Tumblr. I just simply want to leave it behind. I’m satisfied with where I’ve gone and what I’ve become, to the point where I don’t want to be held down by anything.

So I leave you all with one of the best songs from the soundtrack of my favorite movie. Donnie Darko has been a film that has changed in my life in so many ways, helping me in pursuing what I truly want and molding me during the past few formative years of my life. So I think it’s fitting for me to leave this here, as a monument to my teenage years spent growing up as a misfit in suburbia. I love this film with every last bit of my being, not only for what it’s done for me, but how it speaks for everything I find important about humanity. And thusly, this song also works perfectly as a final note upon which I can draw shut the phase of my life which Tumblr represents. It’s been fun while it lasted, but I think the time to move on is finally here.

In the words of Donnie Darko, “I can only hope that the answers will come to me in my sleep. I hope that when the world comes to an end, I can breathe a sigh of relief, because there will be so much to look forward to.”

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